Okay - so what is the book about??
The main character of this book, Tamar, is a young orthodox Jewish woman who's husband follows the "law" to the letter. In the beginning of the book you can see that Tamar is very sheltered and as a result she does not seem to have a very open mind. Her world begins to collapse when one night while babysitting her nephew she is raped in her sister's apartment by a black intruder. She debates whether or not to report her rape but then decides against it because in her community "what isn't nice, we don't show". It's all about conformity. She does not want to be "different" - she does not want the entire community to look at her as the girl who was raped - and most of all she fears her husband will divorce her. She fears that her rape will be looked at as adultery and since her husband follows all rules without question -- she knows that if the rules say for him to divorce her - he will do it without question. The stories of the other two characters, Jenny and Hadassah, are very intriguing also. But the tail really surrounds Tamar.
Spoiler Alert:
After Tamar makes the decision to keep the rape a secret -- she finds out that she is pregnant - and the question for all of us is whether or not the baby will come out black!
I am the friend that recommended this book to Mo. Being that she knew I finished the book she drove me CRAZY wanting to know what was going to happen next. Anywho, I loved this book. Reading this book, I felt like an outsider being allowed into the close knit ultra Orthodox Jewish community. I found a lot of things to be shocking! The Sacrifice of Tamar is definitely a must read.
ReplyDeleteAs a person of color, first, and a man, second, “The Sacrifice of Tamar” initially arose in me uneasiness, a suspicious fear that Tamar's horrific ordeal might ultimately personify the hatred and xenophobia that exists in the world through the perspective of this woman in an insular ultra orthodox Jewish community, specifically. Although not at all surprised by the possibility, I found that dread to be especially disconcerting when I juxtaposed the prospect against the historical injustices to which Jewish people have been subjugated. Consequently, even while truly sympathizing with Tamar's adverse trauma and its resulting stark isolation, I felt weary that the singular black rapist would ultimately symbolize and/or, worst, somehow try to validate society's fear of black people as a whole. Certainly, frequently, Tamar's at times gruelling yet largely stirring story did confirm the fact of life that racism and xenophobia persist; however, encouragingly and most importantly, the book shows that their poisonous roots spring out as the product of routine close-minded/myopic and judgmental viewpoints that are veiled under the all-encompassing so called "positive" umbrella of culture and tradition.
ReplyDeleteDespite depicting clear evidence of this ugly truth, the author, Naomi Ragen, skillfully provides a nuanced view into the life of the larger Jewish diasporic community, giving light to how the desire for the greater post-Holocaust restoration/preservation and self-determination/solidarity of a people can simultaneously inhibit the self-determination and freedom of individuals, families, and even the larger group as a whole. Although, one cannot explain away irrational fear or hatred (Tamar had rational reasons for both considering…), Ragen astutely shows how they take form insidiously in a community’s perception of outsiders and even among its members view of others within their society. I enjoyed the book because Ragen artfully shows depth/breadth in her depictions of this particular group’s human stories, lending awareness to the tremendous good and atrocious bad in these societies.
My dominant opinion of the book hinged on the assiduousness w/ which Ragen depicted this dichotomy, seen in Jenny's open and affirming nature contrasted with Tamar and the greater Jewish community's inconsiderate/disapproving one. Tamar's closed-mindedness is often seen in her exchanges with Jenny (and Hadassah). Later, my sympathy for Tamar and understanding of her decision to hide the truth (fear of the possibility of disharmony) subsided and transformed into strong disappointment when Tamar failed to immediately sacrifice herself when circumstances demanded it. By not doing so promptly, Tamar passively yet willingly victimized others, failing both to consider her own victimhood and to adequately empathize with the ordeal of others. Further, Tamar’s final "sacrificial" act, in my opinion, turned out to be a selfish one since she did it not out of concern for the well-being of others, primarily, but rather for her own ends.
Despite Tamar's initial innocence, piety and devotion and her ultimate sacrifice, I had a hard time defending her decisions throughout these pivotal moments, believing strongly in MLK's quote:
"The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy."
However, despite my disappointment with Tamar, I must say that the book as a whole offers a realistic look into the lives of others. Ragen did a tremendous job of given us new to the particulars of Jewish culture and practices, American, Israeli and other, keen insight into the inner dynamics of these culturally rich people. Despite the fact that there was a bit of a lull throughout its middle, I found "The Sacrifice of Tamar" to be quite intriguing when considered for its entirety. I recommend it thoroughly, despite my apprehensions about its protagonist.
Horace